la vida es bella

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me...I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Phillippians 3:12-14

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Location: Twin Cities Metro, Minnesota, United States

Saturday, January 28, 2006

feliz cumpleanos

My baby turned 4 today. My how time flies. And worse than anything, both he and his brother are terribly sick. It made for some great cuddling time, though. At the end of the day while putting him to sleep, all the while grasping a bucket alongside his bed "just in case", he said, "You can leave me alone now, mom. I'm a big boy now. I'm 4..." He ended up asking me if I had work to do, and then reasoned that it would be okay for me to sit in the chair and work on the computer until he fell asleep. I would have been the one who cried myself to sleep had he not presented me with the offer!

I love you Devin! You are such an amazing big boy. You have the ability to make me laugh much like someone else we know well. You are incredibly intelligent and will be able to accomplish anything you set your mind and heart to do. I am blessed by you and can only pray you come to know and love Him and live life to the fullest. And please, always let your mommy put you to sleep if she asks! (= Happy Birthday, love!

Friday, January 20, 2006


"Mommy, you have a really great memory. But sometimes you forget a lot of things."

This is an observation given to me by my son as we were driving earlier in the day. I laughed so hard with him, as he was simply stating the obvious, lacing in a few accompanying loving words so as not to make me feel bad. As I reflect on this statement, I realize how easy it is to accept a word of truth from such an innocent heart. On the other hand, had anyone else made such a simple observation, I am quite sure my defensiveness would have surely kicked in, making me blow out of proportion in some way or another what was intended to be mere cognizance. I would have turned facile statement into ployed criticism. This is something I seem to wrestle with on a consistent basis.

Constantly protecting myself from criticism, exposure of any shortcomings, or other real or perceived threats to the ego creates a wall between myself and anyone else. The more I learn to respond with this state of mind, the further I separate myself from experiencing authenticity with that person; not only that, but my own self assessment becomes skewed.

The opposite side to this is that so many times we speak harsher words to each other than should ever be muttered. Are we so flawed that we cannot manage take our selfishness out of the picture? As disciples, we need to be ever so aware of the intent behind our words and actions, or we create a reason for those we affect to be defensive.

Paul nails it when he says this in 2 Cor 12: "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

This is quite a feat to strive for. But can you imagine the power of a people whose words spoke nothing but truth in love? Can you fathom the freedom that would come in boasting of our weaknesses?

Sunday, January 15, 2006

the voice

I will always have questions no matter what stage of life or state of emotion i am in. I confuse these for doubts at times, but there is this sense of mystery that will always invade my thoughts. A still voice that is oddly comforting as it says, "There is so much more..."

Monday, January 09, 2006

drum roll please...

Alas, it is here. The Korg Triton Studio. The one and only. It has been here for a while, but I haven't gotten around to writing about it. My church was able to make this purchase, and I am so excited about the possibilities. Some feared that my nights would no longer consist of blogging, but would be eaten up by this amazing piece of equipment. However, due to the monstrosity of the thing, we can't quite figure out how to adequately transport it from home to church and back, meaning it collects some dust during the week. Not only that, but it will take me a nice long time to make use of all its capabilities. If anyone reading happens to know a skilled Korger, give me a ring.

This is Mr. Muscles helping me get it out of the box the first day. The UPS lady and I had quite the time, as well, but it is well worth the efforts.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

-mother teresa

"The fullness of our heart is expressed in our eyes, in our touch, in what we write, in what we say, in the way we walk, the way we receive, the way we need."